My 8 Top Tips for Wedding Dress Shopping

Whether you're opting for an intimate family affair, a boho festival wedding or a traditional church ceremony, your wedding dress is likely to be a big deal. Some brides have been picturing it since they saw their first Disney movie and for others the idea of walking into a dress shop fills them with dread. I was somewhere between those two camps when I first started dress shopping around a year before my autumnal barn wedding, and thankfully I had a really positive dress shopping experience that left me with my dream dress. Here's what I picked up during that process, so if you don't know where to begin or you're just looking for some reassurance, check out these tips.

1. Variety is the spice of life.

Walking into a bridal boutique can be seriously overwhelming, especially when you're asked to start flicking through the rails. It can also be really difficult because most boutiques don't carry every dress in every size and will order one in to fit you instead and make alterations, so whatever you try on is not the finished product. My advice would be to try on quite a few different styles, even if you're going in with a set idea of what you want. I knew I really wanted a dress with sleeves but if I had my time again I would try on a few more different styles, even the strapless or meringue type ones that I would never wear, just for the fun of it. I'm really glad my mum made me try on one "big" dress just for the hell of it. I was surprised how much I liked it! It's your moment, make the most of it!

2. A blank canvas

What underwear should you wear to a bridal appointment? Preferably nude, or as close to the underwear you plan on wearing as possible. Let's be honest, bridal lingerie is actually highly impractical under your dress and what you need is simple, comfy and streamlined. Also, bear the back of your dress in mind. I was actually unable to wear any shapewear with my gown due to its very low back and so some creative solutions were added by the seamstress to keep everything in place!

3. The weight wait

One slight regret with my wedding dress is that I lost too much weight and it is very obvious in some pictures that it was baggy and did not fit properly in certain areas. I did start off by trying to tone up and shift a few pounds after we got engaged because I had developed poor eating habits during lock down, but by the time the wedding came around, I couldn't stop the weight falling off and was told by my dress fitter to go and eat as much cake and chips as I desired as she couldn't alter the dress any more! If you're planning on losing any weight before your wedding (not that anyone should unless they really want to and they plan to do it slowly and safely), maybe wait until you've reached your goal weight before buying your dress, then focus on maintaining it rather than losing any more to avoid an ill-fitting dress.

4. Don't skip the veil!

My Mum and I both said the same thing in our first conversation about dresses:

"No veil!" I was completely against a veil from the start because I wouldn't want it over my face and I felt it was a bit too formal. In my first dress appointment, I declined trying on a veil. While the big poofy dress got my mum and maid of honour all teary, my choice of dress didn't make them quite so emotional. That is, until my first appointment to have my dress fitted. I asked if I could try on a cathedral length veil as my dress had a long train, just so I could have the complete bridal experience. The second that veil touched my head, I had the biggest grin on my face. I turned to look at my mum, to find that she had burst into tears. You might be against it, you might not end up wearing it, but please please please try on the veil!

5. Not a dress person?

I was a tomboy between the ages of around 7 and 11. I worshipped at the temple of Avril Lavigne, my favourite outfit was baggy jeans and a black t-shirt with "GET OVER IT" emblazoned in red glitter and I owned a pair of metallic football boot style trainers that were the envy of several boys in my class. So I understand that not everyone is into dresses. Thankfully, bridal fashion has evolved and there are so many options to choose from. I absolutely love seeing a bride in a sleek white trouser suit or a jumpsuit with some gorgeous embellishments such as pearls or feather trim. If you're still feeling a little extra and want to make your bridal look pop without the fuss and frills of a dress, why not try a jewelled headband, fringed jacket or some funky sunglasses to add that extra something.

6. Choose your entourage carefully.

Like a lot of brides, I went dress shopping with my mum and my maid of honour. That's it. I see a lot of "I said yes to the dress" posts where the bride seems to be accompanied by everyone they've ever met and I marvel at how self-assured they must be to be able to deal with all those opinions and still choose the dress that's right for them. Obviously, every bride is different and some people want key family members such as a grandmother to be present, but I feel so lucky that I had an uncrowded bridal boutique. Another factor to consider is honesty. You'd rather hear it now than when it's too late!

7. If you don't ask, you don't get!

Seamstresses are magical. There is no doubt about it. They are able to nip, tuck, disguise and highlight so expertly and a skilled seamstress is an investment that will pay dividends. The point I'm making here is that if a dress is nearly right or "would be perfect if..." then ask your seamstress. I found a dress that I declared "perfect if it had sleeves!" only to be told that custom sleeves could be made. I was absolutely thrilled! If you've got something specific in mind, ask your seamstress. You'd be surprised what they can whip up!

8. Sleep on it.

This is sooo important. Even if you think you've found the dream dress, even if little cherubs came out of the ceiling and Spandau Ballet start "ha-ha-ha haaaaaa-ha"ing when you put it on, sleep on it. I was 99% certain when I left the dress shop the first weekend I started shopping. When I came back the following weekend, I was 99.5% (we'll come to that in a minute) and that was enough for me, but I'm so glad I took the time to breathe, look back on photos and be sure in my decision.

Now, one last thing. About that 99.5%. There will always be thousands of stunning gowns out there. Take it from someone who blogs about other people's weddings. I've seen my fair share and they are all gorgeous. Sometimes I find myself with dress envy, and it doesn't mean that I wish I'd picked a different dress. It just means that there are so many beautiful choices out there and they are all so different. At this point, I have a little word with myself. I chose my dress because my stomach did back flips when I put it on and I felt like a bride. I adored my dress. I still adore my dress. Any time I see another stunning dress and that 0.5% rears it's ugly head, all I have to do is look back at my wedding album, see how happy I looked and remember how amazing I felt.

If you can get to 100% then I'm really happy for you, but it's ok if you only get to 99.5% especially if you're an indecisive person like me. You're never going to be able to try on every wedding dress in the world, so try on a good selection, find the dress that feels right for you in the moment, sleep on your decision and then say yes to that dress! Or jumpsuit, or blazer.

Happy shopping!

Frankie x